What's the difference between sweet potatoes and yams?

Do you know the difference between sweet potatoes and yams?  I don’t nor do I even especially like either.  They may be the same thing.  Maybe not.  You can discuss it at the Thanksgiving table.  (See here for a summary of the opinions as well as Stephen Colbert’s take on Thanksgiving table debates.)

I love Thanksgiving!

I know there have been articles written about whether Jews can or should celebrate Thanksgiving.  Does Thanksgiving have Christian origins or is it simply an American holiday devoted to the very universal ideal of gratitude? 

I don’t care.  Thanksgiving is as Jewish as apple pie is American! 

It is a day when all Americans can celebrate together.  It is a holiday when rabbis don’t have to give sermons or officiate at services.  It is a day when we can all have the festive meal and drive home afterwards.  

It is a day devoted to gratitude.  We need gratitude.

“I would maintain that thanks are the highest form of thought, and that gratitude is happiness doubled by wonder.” - G.K. Chesterton

Gratitude is at the core of who we are.  It is the source of so many values and good character traits.  Gratitude is central to happiness and satisfaction and an awareness of how good the world can be.

Jews are thankful people.  Literally.

We wake up with the words: Modeh ani – I give thanks.

Jews are called yehudim, which originates from the tribe of Yehudah (Judah).  Leah named her fourth son Yehudah because of her gratitude to God. 

Being a Yehudi (Jew) means being grateful and aware of just how much we have.

What do we have?

In this week’s Torah portion, we can gain a perspective in appreciating what we have.

Yaakov (Jacob) sends a gift to Esav (Esau) to placate him.  The reunion goes reasonably well.  Esav is impressed by the gift but resists accepting it by saying to Yaakov:  “I have a lot (yesh li rav); you keep what is yours.”

Yaakov insists that Esav accept the gift and says, “God has been gracious to me, and I have everything (yesh li kol).”  Esav then accepts the gift.

Here we see two mindsets.  Esav views what he has as being significant.  Maybe he is even grateful for having plenty, but there is still room for more.  Yaakov, however, is completely satisfied with what he has.  He needs nothing else for he has it all.

Rav versus Kol.  We can and should be grateful for having a lot, but can we be so grateful that having what we have is having it all?

We should try. 

Think about how much each of us has.  There is always room for more, but when we say thank you, can we view what we have as having it all?

What am I thankful for?  Just off the top of my head, here are a few things:

-                             Family

-                             Food (especially today’s turkey and stuffing)

-                             Friends

-                            State of Israel (where some people are celebrating Thanksgiving)

-                         Life having meaning and purpose

-                         Ability to help and make an impact on others

Thanksgiving affords us with an opportunity for a religious experience.  We say thank you every day and all the time.  Thanksgiving reinforces that Jewish responsibility while providing us a chance to ask ourselves:

What am I thankful for today on Thanksgiving and every day?  How can I best appreciate that having a lot is really having it all?

Happy Thanksgiving!

Shaking Hands With History

I can’t say anything this week without referring to those murdered by terrorists in Israel.  See here for a list of names and some biographical information and here for some thoughts I shared when the Henkins were murdered. 

Especially powerful for me were the words of Aviad Don, son of murdered educator Rabbi Yaakov Don of Alon Shevut: “Teach me how to be optimistic at times like these.”

Even with pain in our hearts, we seek a way forward.

Jonathan Pollard was released from prison today.

While supporting his release was a hotly debated issue in the Jewish community throughout the years, recently, there was a consensus that Pollard had paid for his crimes (serving more time in jail than any other spy for a friendly country) and should be released on humanitarian grounds.

As a youngster, I remember being fascinated by the Pollard affair.  I read the book Pollard: The Spy’s Story written by Bernard Henderson, the father of Ann Pollard, Jonathan’s wife at the time of his arrest. 

Another way I connected to the story was that Jonathan Pollard’s sister lived in my hometown.  I knew her, and, through her, I felt a greater connection to something historic (or history in the making).

I mention this because, however one feels about the Pollard case, this is a historic moment.  A Jewish American spy for Israel, whose case was constantly an issue when American and Israeli leaders met, has now been released.  It is the end of an era.

We study history, and we remember history.  How often do we feel like we’re part of history?

Rabbi Marc Angel shared some reflections about Rabbi Dr. David de Sola Pool, the Rabbi of Congregation Shearith Israel for 63 years until his passing in 1970.  Rabbi Angel describes how he felt connected to history by connecting with this venerable rabbi:

When I shook Dr. Pool’s hand, I was shaking the hand of a great spiritual leader who had begun his service to Shearith Israel in 1907; he had taken over from Dr. Mendes who had begun service to Shearith Israel in 1877. I was one handshake away from 1877! And just a few more handshakes separated me from Rev. Gershom Mendes Seixas who had begun serving Shearith Israel in 1768. I felt the weight of centuries, the incredible continuity of a magnificent tradition.

It is important to reinforce our connections to history.  I believe that how strongly we feel bound to history will determine the future of the Jewish people.  If we feel connected to the past and responsible for carrying it forward to the next generation (so that one day we are the past), then Judaism will thrive.  If we do not feel the power and responsibility of the past, then it will be much harder for Judaism to move forward to the future.

Is Hashem a Boy or a Girl?

One of my favorite weekly activities is to teach a short Torah portion lesson to Ramaz third graders.  For a rabbi, it’s great for the self-esteem.  They listen attentively and think I have all the answers.  (The only better audience is Nursery students.  They think I’m a rock star!)

Kids ask the best questions!  Especially in the Torah portions of Bereishit, their questions touch at some of the most essential issues.  Was Avraham Jewish?  How did Sarah hear Hashem?  Why didn’t Yitzchak and Rivka talk to each other about who should receive the blessing?

Last week, I walked into the lunchroom while the third graders were eating lunch.  They saw me, and one shouted out, “Is Hashem a boy or a girl?”  It is just the type of question I expect from young students.  They are excited and have passion.

Do we?

Two weeks ago, I returned to my hometown (New Haven, CT) to attend the 70^th anniversary gala of my local day school, the Southern Connecticut Hebrew Academy, where I was recognized as a distinguished alumnus.  Let’s just say, I am more grown up now, and both guys at the podium are much older than we used to be.

 

I was transported back more than 30 years ago to memories of the classroom, teachers, incidents, and questions.  And you know what?  It felt very good.  Those were the experiences that helped make me who I am.  Those are the formative experiences that have shaped us.

They also can continue to shape us if we let them.   

A few days ago, I met with a congregant, and we discussed a unique insight into Adam and Chava and the aftermath of their eating from the Tree of Knowledge.  The Torah says that “their eyes were opened.”  Daniel R. noted that, as we grow older, our eyes are opened to new perspectives and new ideas that make it difficult for us to recapture the innocence we had before that happens.  We don’t always appreciate those formative experiences when we were younger and life was simpler.

We need to close our eyes.  We need to transport ourselves back spiritually to when we were excited about the simple questions and sought out answers.

We should get in touch with our “inner child” or former student self.  We should return to basic yet important questions and see that they can reawaken within us that enthusiasm we used to have.  Why shouldn’t we have more of that today?

Take a look at your children or grandchildren or any children.  Try to see the world through their eyes and examine age-old questions through a fresh perspective.

Is Hashem a boy or a girl?  Why did Yitzchak love Esav while Rivkah loved Yaakov?  Was Avraham Jewish?   What’s on your mind?  What’s on our children’s minds?

Let us ask ourselves and each other the questions that will generate enthusiasm for a life filled with seeking meaningful answers.

Halloween & Hospitality

“Avraham ran to the mal’achim to be machnis orchim (invite guests)!” 

This is the chorus for a Jewish children’s song by “613 Torah Avenue” that I remember from my youth and was wafting through the halls as it was played for the Ramaz Early Childhood Center Shabbat party.  (If you want to enjoy it for yourself, click here.)  It describes Avraham’s hospitality, which appears in this week’s Torah reading and sets an example for all of us.

Avraham went out of his way to welcome guests. Do we?

The Machlis family does.  Their Jerusalem home is famous for Friday night dinners with more than 100 guests.  Same thing for Shabbat lunch.  Their hachnasat orchim is exceptional.  (Henny Machlis recently passed away at the age of 58.  See here for more about the family’s unbelievable chesed.  Here's another great article about the benefits and joys of hospitality.)

I shared the Machlis hospitality with my Ramaz students today.  We discussed inviting guests and making people feel welcome.  I think it is a sign of the times (or of living in Manhattan) that some of the students asked if it is safe to invite strangers home.  (I told them to always make sure to check with an adult.) 

I must admit to being a little envious of the Machlis family.  It would be incredible to create an open Shabbat environment for all.  We have congregational and Beginners Shabbat dinners, but how can we take this to the next level?  How can we internalize the lesson of Avraham and seek out ways to invite all of our brothers and sisters home?  

There is no easy answer, but it begins with developing a hospitable mindset and appreciating the need to make everyone feel welcome and comfortable.  And, believe it or not, I think Halloween may have something to teach us.

Now, while I love candy as much as the next guy, I do not think Jews have any business celebrating Halloween.  My colleague, Rabbi Eric Grossman sent out a most appropriate message about the subject as did my good friend, Rabbi Adam Starr.  I get it.  Halloween is fun.  We need to do a better job making Judaism fun, but we save our dressing up for Purim. 

However, this idea of being open to all sorts of people stopping by for a treat – including weird looking characters – has a nice ring to it.

In some Jewish neighborhoods, people turn out the lights so as not to be disturbed by trick-or-treaters. Here’s a story I heard from my brother about an “Ultra-Orthodox” rabbi who had another approach:

Mr. Yakov Paneth reports that when he brought his future wife to meet Rabbi Avraham Pam, the famed head of Yeshiva Torah Vodaath, it happened to be Halloween night.  While Rav Pam refused to take any phone calls during the meeting because he felt it was rude, he did answer the door for the trick-or-treaters who kept ringing the doorbell and dropped a piece of chocolate into each basket with a smile on his face.

On this Shabbat of Avraham’s hospitality, let’s give some thought to how we can be more radically hospitable and make others feel as welcome and comfortable as we do.

How’s that for a nice treat?

1.21 gigawatts?! Looking to the future

What did you do to mark Back to the Future Day? (Do you even know what I’m talking about?)

October 21, 2015 is the date 30 years in the future to which Doc Brown and Marty McFly travel in the film, Back to the Future.  (Here’s a blast from the past - 1.21 gigawatts?!) 

Well, the future is here.  How did we do?  Cars don’t fly, and we don’t really have hover boards.  We haven’t brought peace to the Middle East, and who could have guessed Donald Trump would be leading the polls in the 2016 presidential election back in 1985?  (See here for a humorous look from the “Jimmy Kimmel Live” show.)

While it would be nice to predict the future, the world is a very unpredictable place.  One of the great things about the people – and the Jewish people in particular – is our ability to always move forward regardless of the situation.

On YNET right now is the report of a family of five injured when a terrorist threw a fire bomb at their car (refuah shleimah!) as well as reporting on a successful Tel Aviv fashion week.

Terrorists show no concern for decency and morality by attacking men, women, and children, and there is absolutely no regard for the truth on the Palestinian side.  The Jews, however grapple with morality.  Israeli hospitals treat both terror victims and terrorists.  (Just today, Mahmoud Abbas’s brother-in-law had lifesaving heart surgery in Israel.)  While the number of terrorist attacks in Israel increased, Rav David Stav of Tzohar was addressing the moral issues of harming neutralized terrorists.

Where do we get the ability to balance firebombs and fashion and murder and morality? 

Lech lecha.  We get going?  Avraham left and didn’t know exactly where he would end up.  He embarked on the journey, entered the land, and then stopped.  Who told him where to stop?  Avraham just know.  There is something inside us that allows us to keep going, to focus on the positive, and to strive for what is right. 

There are some things which seem to never change – like the Arab position on the Temple Mount or the UN being anti-Israel.  At the same time, we can be sure that our commitment to life moving forward, to goodness, to joy, and to looking towards the future will never change either.

Here’s to the future! 

P.S. Israel is obviously on our minds and in our hearts more than usual.  Rabbi Lookstein, in his message to the KJ community, captured the ways that we can respond religiously and practically, and here is another great message of what we can do for Israel at this time.

It is really STILL z'man simchateinu?

The rain falling outside adds even more gloom to what should be an otherwise joyous Sukkot holiday.

Israeli mother and father shot dead in West Bank terror attack

Oregon gunman kills 9 is rampage

“Suddenly I heard my children scream” Mother describes rock throwing attack

Unfortunately – both in Israel and here in the US, such terrible headlines are not unheard of.  But the pain and shock are great.  The murder of Rabbi Eitam and Na’ama Henkin cuts especially deep as the story of the 4 children in the car is so horrific and many of us are familiar with Eitam’s esteemed parents, Rabbi Yehudah and Rabbanit Chana Henkin.

Since hearing the news of these murders, I have been very uneasy.  What senseless acts!  What kind of animals could do this?  Is this really z’man simchateinu, the holiday of rejoicing?

In May of 1957 fedayeen terrorists entered the village of Kfar Chabad in Israel.  They made their way to the synagogue of the local agricultural school, where the school's young students were in the midst of the evening prayers, and raked the room with fire from their rifles.  Five children and one teacher were killed and another ten children wounded.  Despair and dejection pervaded the village.  There were some who saw what happened as a sign that their dream of a peaceful life in Israel was premature.  The idea of disbanding the community was raised. The village was slowly dying.  The Chasidim sent a telegram to the Lubavitcher Rebbe in New York and eagerly awaited a response.

Five days later, a response via telegram came from the Rebbe.  It had just three words: “Be’hemshech ha-binyan tinacheimu - By your continued building will you be comforted.”

Jews move on.  We will continue to celebrate Sukkot and soon Simchat Torah – even with the lingering pain.  Be’hemshech ha-simcha tinacheimu – the only way to move forward is for the holiday to continue even in the shadow of such heavy sadness.

I felt this message in my kishkes this morning while leading a pre-Simchat Torah program for Ramaz Lower School students.  We were all singing and dancing with the Torahs to get into a Simchat Torah spirit.  I explained to the students that we are happy on Simchat Torah because the Torah is who we are, where we come from, and all the good things that we are trying to be.

As over 100 first and second graders stood singing Ha-mal’ach ha-goeil oti, the powerful words Jacob used to bless Efraim and Menashe, I felt the Rebbe’s response resonate.  In the aftermath of terrible tragedy, we will sing and dance and propel the Jewish future forward.

We still have much to celebrate this holiday.

The Pope and I

Shana tova!  I can still say that until Hoshana Rabba, which is the official end of the penitential season (unless you’re Chasidic and extend it until the last day of Chanukah).  May you have a happy, healthy, sweet, successful, and peaceful year ahead.

I just returned from “A Witness to Peace: A Multi-Religious Gathering with Pope Francis” at the National September 11 Memorial and Museum.  It was an impressive gathering of religious leaders from many different faiths.  The rabbi and cantor of Park Avenue Synagogue participated in the program, which included a moving El Maleh Rachamim prayer in memory of those killed on 9/11.  (I had great seats as you can see from the pictures below.)  

Pope Francis did not make any bold pronouncements.  He just simply encouraged everyone to join together to work and pray for peace.  That’s it.  It was a quiet yet powerful experience of many different people from different religions who normally have plenty of disagreements coming together in that room for one moment committed to one goal.

On the subway ride back uptown, I was standing next to someone holding the program of the event.  We each noticed where we were both coming from, and we started sharing reactions to the experience.  We agreed that it was a wonderful moment of unity.  We both wondered why it could seem so simple in that room at that moment. but that the feeling can’t last.

  

                     

Maybe by acknowledging this feeling, we can work to make the feeling last.

People ask me if I am glad that High Holidays are over.  I understand the question.  This is the season when rabbis work the hardest, the pressure is highest, and often feels the craziest.  At the same time, I often reply that I wish the High Holidays would last all year.  This is the time of year when Jews are most interested in what I have to say!  I wish I could reel them in like this year round.

There is another reason I am not glad the holidays are over.  I miss that special "High Holiday feeling" when it's gone. 

While breaking the fast after Yom Kippur, I caught myself thinking: “One hour ago, I was leading the Neilah service for 350 people.  We were all praying and singing together, and the room was rocking with spiritual feeling, positive energy, and good feeling.  Now, I am chewing on a bagel…”

Now, I know it can’t be Rosh Hashanah or Yom Kippur all year round.  Even I could not handle it.  But there needs to be a way to capture some of that passion and commitment and harness it to last all year long.  I think the answer is the holiday of Sukkot.  To give you just a little something to think about, it includes all sorts of religious symbols, and messages, and observances, and sermon topics.  It allows us to lower the intensity a bit while still being very significantly engaged in Jewish living for another 9 days.

I love this time of the year.  I am looking forward to what’s left of the holiday season and to trying to keep a little bit of the High Holidays with me for the rest of the year.  Which aspects of the High Holidays do you want to hold on to?

Let’s make the feelings last.