Youth is Not Only for the Young

“If you are not a liberal at 25, you have no heart. If you are not a conservative at 45, you have no brain.”

This quote is a version of a sentiment attributed to various thinkers including Thomas Jefferson. As people age, their viewpoints change. Some people are more idealistic in their youth, while, with the passage of time, some may become more cynical and less optimistic of being able to solve the world’s problems.

We cannot stop growing older, but we can try to maintain our youthful enthusiasm and optimism our whole lives.

“Sarah’s lifetime—the span of Sarah’s life—came to one hundred years and twenty years and seven years.” (Bereishit 23:1)

The commentators note the redundancy in the verse to mean that Sarah lived an incredibly meaningful life for her entire life. Rashi notes that, even at the age of 100, Sarah still possessed characteristics of a much younger woman of 20 and even some childlike qualities of a girl of 7.

The Talmud (Bava Kamma 97b) notes that there was a coin that represented Avraham and Sarah. (Think of those commercials for commemorative coins from the Franklin Mint. Remember those?) On one side, there was a likeness of an old man and an old woman, and, on the other, there was a likeness of a young man and a young woman. Some commentators explain this as representing Avraham and Sarah and Yitzchak and Rivkah. The older generation giving way to the new. I prefer understanding both sides of the coin as representing Avraham and Sarah, who, while older and wiser, maintained their youthful curiosity and idealism. We may think that both sides of the coin are not found in the same person, but they can be. For Avraham and Sarah, wisdom and idealism were mutually exclusive ideas but two sides of the same coin.

This may help us understand the debate regarding how old Avraham was when he discovered God. Some say he was 3 years old. Others say he was 40. The answer is both! Avraham had a childlike relationship with God, one of simple faith and awe similar to the way preschool students think about Hashem. At the same time, Avraham also thought deeply and rationally about his relationship with God. It wasn’t all songs and wonder. Avraham related to God as a mature adult with all the complexity that entails.

Each of us must strive to combine youthful enthusiasm and thoughtful maturity. Rabbi Joseph Soloveitchik teaches:

 “The child is endowed with a capacity of an all-absorbing faith and trustfulness; youth bursts with zealousness, idealism, and optimism; the adult, mellowed with years, has the benefit of accumulated knowledge and dispassionate judgment. Each age is physically and psychologically attuned to particular emphases, but the superior individual can retain and harmonize the positive strengths of all three periods during his or her lifetime” 

                    (Man of Faith in Modern World by Rabbi Abraham Besdin, p. 89)

How can we harmonize our youthful zealousness and adult mellowness?

Firstly, we need to learn from each other. Older people should seek advice from the young people to infuse some fresh ideas and creativity into the way we’ve always done things. This can be at home, in school, in shul, or in communal institutions. Young people are always telling me I’m old. Instead of being insulted, I should ask them how they think I can be less old. At the same time, young people should seek advice from those who have been around longer to gain wisdom and life experience.

A second way to merge idealism and experience is to encourage intergenerational activities. It is true that the music may be too loud for the older people and the program too long for the youngsters, but the best way to optimize the experience is when we all come together. There is a time for different demographics to do their own thing, but we can strive for a synergistic relationship in which new approaches are taken without abandoning the past. Each generation needs to appreciate its essential role in being the generation that came before and will come next.

George Bernard Shaw famously said, "Youth is wasted on the young" It doesn’t have to be true. We can be old and young at the same time. Just as young people need the wisdom and tradition of the past, older people need the enthusiasm, passion, and idealism of the old. The goal is a synthesis. Rav Kook put it best: “Hayashan yit-hadesh vehahadash yitkadesh – That which seems old can become new, and that which is new can become sacred.”