Is there anyone who can bring politicians of different parties, bitter rivals who can’t seem to agree on anything, together?
It seems like Rachel Goldberg can.
Rachel is the widow of IDF Captain Rabbi Avi Goldberg, 43, who was killed in action last Saturday night. “Rav Avi” was a beloved teacher at the Himmelfarb Yeshiva High School in Jerusalem and leaves behind 8 children - Yehudah, Shira, Talia, Hadas, Eliyashiv, Hallel, Reut, and Naveh. Since October 7, he spent over 250 days in the IDF reserves. Rachel Sharansky Danziger wrote a moving tribute to her friend and neighbor, who was known for his open home, warm personality, and willingness to engage all Jews.
“Rav Avi looked at the world with so much clarity, so much love for the Jewish people and humanity…Twenty years ago, Rav Avi began organizing and leading Yom Kippur prayers at the secular kibbutz Ginosar. For many members of the kibbutz, he was the first religious person they had ever gotten to know. Despite his beard, his large kipah, and his unwavering belief in Torah and Jewish law, he broke through every barrier and preconception against him that might have prevented his welcome, thanks to his warmth, humility, and ‘maor panim’ — his inner light.”
Rachel, a nurse, was Rav Avi’s partner in everything he did. It is, therefore, no surprise that she demanded unity from those who wanted to make a shiva visit to console the family. A statement released by the family noted:
“At a time when the rifts in Israeli society are growing, it is important for us to underline the value of unity…The family welcomes politicians from all camps to our shiva. But we ask that you come together in pairs - one from the coalition and one from the opposition…Rabbi Avi, together with his wife Rachel, dedicated his life and invested much time and work to connect between parts of Israeli society. This is the proper way to part from him and accompany him on his final journey.”
Several lawmakers heeded the family’s call. Photos circulating on social media Tuesday showed lawmakers from five different parties – Likud, National Unity, Otzma Yehudit, Shas, and Yesh Atid - making a shiva visit together. Separately, National Unity MK Matan Kahana also visited with Shas MK Erez Malul.
We need more breaking of barriers, crossing of aisles, and pairing up of people with different perspectives.
There is so much toxic disagreement and delegitimization of people with opposing views today. We believe in machloket, honest disagreement. (After all, two Jews must yield three opinions.) What we see all around us, however, is more like a need for uniformity. The problem is certainly exacerbated by the upcoming election. At the same time, the calls are growing louder from all sides that there is only one correct position. There is only one pro-Israel candidate. There is only one way for the economy to improve. There is only one way to view the strengths or weaknesses of particular politicians. I may very well feel that way but ignoring and completely discounting other voices is not the Torah way.
“Everyone on earth had the same language and the same words.” (Bereishit 11:1)
What was so wrong with the plan to make a name and build a tower? Rabbi Naftali Zvi Yehuda Berlin, the Netziv, explains it was the mindset of the Builders of Bavel that was so detrimental.
“The text did not explain what the people’s 'few words' were…[I]t wasn't because of the content of the words themselves that the Holy One of Blessing was distressed. They were what they were, and in its simplicity there is not sin, and on the contrary all appears well. But here what happened is that all thought the same thing, and this came to be the problem of the settlement.”
The problem with the Builders of Bavel was they were trying to construct a society built on absolute conformity, of people being required to think and act alike. It is one thing to have a common purpose or community standards. It is destructive, however, when the people demand absolute allegiance to a society of their own creation.
What was true then is still true today. We live in a world where, all too often, people want to live only with those who think, act, and speak alike. Everyone else is wrong.
Rabbi Marc Angel has written about the dangers of “echo reasoning,” when people only listen or speak to those with similar views. Members of the closed circle become more extreme, less able to reason independently or tolerate opposing views. There is nothing wrong with being confident in one’s own position. To be morally strong and intellectually sound, however, we need to be open to hearing criticism of our own views and listening to opinions different than our own.
We need to think; to challenge and be challenged; to express our views and listen to the views of others. Choose one issue about which you feel passionate and try to put yourself in the mindset of someone who would disagree. If you find yourself reacting negatively to a different point of view or an opponent’s behavior, stop and think why they may be acting that way instead of feeling angry and shouting them down.
Rachel Goldberg honored her late husband by asking us to pair up with those with whom we disagree. There will always be machloket, but that doesn’t mean we can’t find ways to bridge the divides and cultivate that which unites us. That’s what Rav Avi would do.
