Dream On!

Why did Yosef’s brothers hate him?

Conventional wisdom states that they hated him because Yosef presented himself as better than his brothers.

When we look carefully at the text, however, we see that the brothers begin to hate Yosef even before he tells them his dreams. Knowing that Yosef is a dreamer is enough for the brothers to hate him.

What’s wrong with dreaming?

Rabbi Joseph Soloveichik delivered a lecture in which he discusses Yosef and his dreams. The Rav compares Yosef and his brothers to the Zionists and their religious opponents. The Zionists were dreamers. They saw the need for a Jewish State and took the necessary action to try to make it a reality. The anti-Zionist camp could not tolerate the risks involved. They saw the pursuit of a Jewish State as fraught with danger to the Jewish tradition. It was too risky to take Judaism into the sphere of state-making.

Similarly, Yosef was a dreamer. He saw the tremendous possibility for the worldview of Avraham, Yitzchak, and Yaakov to elevate the rest of the world through engaging with it. The brothers were satisfied with the way things were going and were resistant to change. Yosef - like the early Zionists - was a dreamer, a visionary, who was willing to go out on a limb and take risks to achieve great accomplishments.

Dreamers may bother us at times because they are seeking to change the status quo. They want to change something that we also feel needs to be changed – but we’re not dreaming. We’re not the ones working to change things. In a way, we resent the dreamer’s willingness to envision a better reality because we are unwilling to do so ourselves.

Instead of dreamers bothering us, we should become the dreamers.

Our Sages teach that dreams are 1/60 of nevuah (prophecy). We may not be nevi’im (prophets), but we are bnei nevi’im, descended from prophets. Dreams are in our DNA.

We all have a responsibility to dream.

The parsha opens with the words, “Vayeishev Yaakov, Jacob dwelled in the land.” The Sages comment, “Bikesh Yaakov leisheiv b’shalva – Jacob wanted to reside in tranquility.” Yaakov had a difficult life. He had been on the run from his brother, was mistreated by his father-in-law, had a large family to feed, and had just endured a lot of drama with Dina. He figured he deserved a little R&R and to live in peace.

Yaakov was wrong.

God comes along and sets Yaakov straight. An easy life is not the lot of the righteous individual. Life is for work. Life is to find issues causes that require our attention and fix them. Life is for dreaming.

Instead of the tranquil life Yaakov thought he deserved, the Yosef saga unfolds.

Yosef’s brothers seemed to embrace Yaakov’s attitude on life. They hated the dreaming type. Yosef reminded them of what they should be doing but weren’t. They needed to get rid of him.

In the end, Yosef was right. Yosef – and all subsequent dreamers – remind us of the need to think big and dream on. We should not sit back and settle; we need to invest effort and move forward.

Chanukah also teaches this message.

According to the Talmud, one candle per household suffices to fulfill the mitzvah of the Chanukah lights. A better form of fulfillment is to light one candle per person. The best way to fulfill the mitzvah is for each person who lights to light an ascending number of candles each night. This is called, “Mehadrin min ha-mehadrin,” the best of the best way to perform the mitzvah.

Unique among Jewish practices, EVERYONE lights Chanukah candles the best way possible. For other observances, “just enough” will suffice, but not for the Chanukah lights. On Chanukah, each of us aims high and dreams big.

Yosef is the dreamer, and it is Yosef whom we call the tzaddik, righteous. He understood that, to achieve righteousness, we must have a dream for which we are striving.

What is your dream? In what way can each of us move beyond the status quo? It may be Torah study. We can aspire to learn a book of Jewish learning, attend a class, or teach someone else more about Judaism. It may relate Israel. What can we do to be more supportive of Israel? It may be to assist those in need. What actions can we take to help them? Can we donate money or volunteer in a way that creates a more caring community?

Israeli singer Hanan Ben Ari sings, “Gam ani choleim k’mo Yosef – I also dream like Joseph.” It’s a contemporary take on overcoming challenges and achieving goals by following Yosef’s example to imagine big and change the world. We need to dream like Yosef to enhance our lives and the lives of those around us.

Dream on!

More, More, More: Rav vs. Kol

Why do we have so much stuff?

We lived in a Manhattan apartment for many years. I got used to things sometimes being a bit cluttered as we fit a lot of stuff into a relatively small space. When we moved into a house, I figured we would have lots of open space as the same stuff would be accommodated in a larger space.

I was wrong.

There seems to meta-scientific law that stuff expands. The more space you have, the more stuff you get. (Except for those annoyingly neat, minimalistic people.)

In So Much Stuff, archaeologist Chip Colwell investigates how and why humanity went from needing nothing to needing everything. In the beginning, there was “Ötzi the Iceman,” the name given to the well-preserved 5,000-year-old human mummy found in the Alps. He was carrying half his body weight of stuff that he needed. Some of those items – like his backpack, shoes, coat, undergarments, and tools – are the same type of things we carry around today. Whereas 5,000 years ago, the average household had only a few thousand items, today, we have over 300,000.

There are many factors as to why we now have more things. There’s simply more items available due to advances in technology, lifespan, and other factors. Obviously, the balance between needs and wants – and how to define which is which – plays a role and can be very subjective. As Judaism teaches (Avot 4:1), “Who is wealthy? One who is happy with one’s lot.” Whether one’s lot is a lot or too much will depend on perspective.

Yaakov provides a great perspective of how to appreciate what we have.

In advance of encountering his brother for the first time in over 20 years, Yaakov sends Esav a gift. The reunion goes reasonably well.  Esav is impressed by the gift but resists accepting it by saying to Yaakov, “Yesh li rav - I have a lot; you keep what is yours.”

Yaakov insists that Esav accept the gift and says, “God has been gracious to me. Yesh li kol - I have everything.” Esav then accepts the gift.

Here we see two mindsets. Esav views what he has as being significant. Maybe he is even grateful for having plenty and declines taking some of Yaakov’s wealth. Nevertheless, there is always room for more. Yaakov, however, is completely satisfied with what he has. He needs nothing else for he has it all.

Rav versus Kol. We can and should be grateful for having a lot, but can we be so grateful that having what we have is having it all? We should try.

Is it ever OK to “want more?”

The answer to this question relates to the Rav vs. Kol dynamic. Wanting more just to want more so that we can accumulate more is an Esav perspective. Wanting more “l’shem shamayim,” to help others or to improve ourselves or to make the world better is exactly the perspective Yaakov models for us.

I think this dynamic was the root of a strange dispute that arose in the religious community in Israel concerning a very popular Israeli song that is all the rage at weddings and celebrations. The song, Tamid Ohev Oti (God Always Loves Me), is based on a spiritual teaching of Rabbi Shalom Arush and features the chorus, “Od yoteir tov…v’tamid yihyeh li rak tov – God will keep making things better and better…and will always make it only good for me.” (It’s much catchier when you hear it.)

What can be wrong with things getting better and better? Some rabbis were disturbed with the aspiration for more goodness and more goodness and only good things. They claimed that’s not what Jews ask for nor how they ask. We should be satisfied with what we have and recognize “bad things” also have lessons for us to ponder.

I think a song can just be a song, and the controversy seems to have subsided with the opponents backing down. At the same time, our celebration and excitement for “Od yoteir tov,” greater and greater good should be motivated by Yaakov’s perspective. We should appreciate that what we have is what we need and that having more – more blessing, more peace, more kindness, and more love – should be for the right reasons – to live better lives as Jews and make the lives of those around us better.

That’s a lot and that will make things even better. Yesh lanu kol…v’od yoteir tov!

Transforming a Place into a Makom

King David never set foot in Migdal David.

The site, also known as the Tower of David and David’s Citadel, is now a museum and event space. Originally ancient Hasmonean and Herodian fortifications, the current structures were built during the Mamluk and Ottoman periods on top of a series of earlier ancient fortifications destroyed during the Crusades. The site was named "Tower of David" in the 5th century CE by the Byzantine Christians, who believed the site to be the palace of King David. They took the name from Shir HaShirim (4:4), “Your neck is a like a tower of David (migdal David).”

Migdal David has multiple stories to tell, but what makes it special? What makes any place special?

A place is special when it becomes a makom.

Now, this is a tricky proposition because makom literally translates as “place.” Makom, however, means much more.

“Va-yifga ba-makom va-yalen sham ki va ha-shemesh - Yaakov came upon a certain place and stopped there for the night, for the sun had set.” (Bereishit 28:11)

On a literal level, it got dark, and Yaakov stopped in a place to sleep. The commentaries are not satisfied with letting a place be just a place. A place can be transformed into a makom.

Rashi says it was The Place. It was Har HaMoriah, the mountain on which Avraham was prepared to offer Yitzchak as an offering that, ultimately, was the site of the Temple. That’s a pretty important makom.

Seforno explains that the place was a familiar, helpful place. It was known as a rest stop for travelers to stop, eat, sleep. Yaakov stopped there because everyone stopped there when they needed a break. The place was a makom, a destination for those in need.

Rashbam keeps it simple and geographical. Yaakov stopped near the city of Luz. That’s where he was.

A makom is more than a place; it is an encounter.

There are sublime, holy encounters.
There are encounters when one receives or gives assistance to another.
There are encounters with God in the ordinary or even the unexpected.

Makom as an encounter explains why we refer to God as Ha-Makom at the Seder (“Baruch Ha-Makom”) or when we comfort the mourner (“Ha-Makom yenacheim etchem…”). In life, we can move from place to place or experience sublime, meaningful, and helpful encounters.

Rabbi Shmuel Goldin shares an amazing story about a visit he made to the Theresienstadt camp. The guide took the group behind what had been a bakery and down some steps to a hidden underground room. Suddenly they found themselves in a small synagogue which had been built by a group of Danish Jews, secretly, under the eyes of their Nazi tormentors. Imagine the courage and devotion of these individuals who risked their lives to create a makom to worship God even at a time when God’s face seemed very hidden!

On the walls of the small shul, passages from the Torah and liturgy had been painted in a fashion common to European synagogues of that time. One was the declaration made by Yaakov (Bereishit 28:17):

“Ma nora ha-makom ha-zeh! Ein zeh ki im beit Elokim v’zeh sha’ar ha-shamayim - How awesome is this place! This is none other than the House of God and this is the gate to heaven!”

A makom in Theresienstadt. A “House of God” and a “gate to heaven” in what would seem to be only a place of death and destruction.

Each place we go is really a potential makom – and a potential Sha’ar Ha-Shamayim.

Getting back to the Tower of David, Migdal David can be a place. This past Sunday, Migdal David became an inspiring, uplifting, joyous makom.

Some 200 family and friends came together to celebrate the wedding of Tom Shemia and Rebecca Douer at Migdal David. Besides the location being beautifully transformed and decorated, I felt as if the stones had come alive. We were living the fulfillment of the Yirmiyahu’s prophecy (33:10-11):

“Od yishama b’arei Yehudah u’vechutzot Yerushalayim, kol sasson v’kol simcha kol chatan v’kol kallah – Once again shall be heard in the cities of Judah and the streets of Jerusalem the sound of joy and rejoicing and the song of the groom and the bride.”

I didn’t even have to use my imagination. Right in front of my eyes were the stones of Jerusalem dating back more than 2,000 years. Built by the victors of the Chanukah story, taken over by Roman conquerors before being used and destroyed by Muslims and Christians, and now it is the site for a Jewish wedding. Everyone in attendance travelled to Israel in hostile times because of a deep connection to the couple and optimism and hope for the Jewish future. I was, thank God, together with Naama and our children along with congregants, life-long friends, and strangers in creating a most meaningful makom.

Each of us will encounter many different places along our life’s journeys. We should aspire to turn each place into a makom, to recognize the sacred potential of every place we inhabit and to make room for God and others in our lives.